I’m in love with food. I’m in love with eating. I especially love simple carbohydrates and sugar – which are the worst things to be in love with when you’re someone with my health concerns. Simple carbs and sugar are absolutely ideal if you want to spike blood glucose levels and gain fat on the body, but I’m in need of some unfattening and low sugar levels, so what to do?
Well, I had to go through a grieving period. For example, I was very sad that I couldn’t eat as much ‘normal’ bread as I used to (as in, I didn’t exactly cut bread out completely but I found alternatives that I can eat in moderation). I had to stop with the crisps and chips. Mashed potatoes ☹ Mashed potatoes are LIFE. It’s not fair. Anyway, I digress.
I got super strict with myself and decided to cut out simple carbs (or severely reduce them let’s say) from my diet. I also stopped eating anything with added sugar – and if the naturally occurring sugars were still higher than I liked I stopped eating those things too.
It hasn’t been easy, but part of what has made it more bearable is the drastic change in my physical appearance in a relatively short period of time. That’s been amazing. I haven’t been very good at tracking my weight loss or measurements during this time,(and deliberately so – but I’ll talk about that more in another post), but I definitely saw a difference in the way my clothes were fitting, and people were starting to take notice and make comments on my weight loss – so I know it was happening.
I’m about eight or nine months down the line and I’ve dropped about two and a half dress sizes (I say this because I’m hovering between two sizes at the moment). In total, I’ve lost about 8/9kg in weight and I have about 5kg more before I reach my goal weight. The amount lost doesn’t seem like much, but it has made a massive difference in my appearance on someone with my frame because I’m quite tall and I used to carry my weight in such a way that most people I know didn’t seem to think I was overweight when actually, I was.
With all the working out I’ve been doing, I’ve also put on some muscle (not loads), but there is some toning and definition going on which I really enjoy and feel quite smug about *insert smug face here*. I’ve had to deal with some ignorant comments about not becoming ‘bulky’ and ‘too muscular’ because I tend to favour training that incorporates weights… but I was determined to carry on because I understand that as a female I don’t have enough testosterone in my system to suddenly become ‘butch’ from swinging some kettle bells around or lifting the odd dumbbell.
The only downside to the weight loss – and maintaining it as far as I can see (apart from the persistent muscle soreness), is the weird things you notice about your own perception of yourself. I’ve started looking in the mirror more and scrutinising things more. There are certain areas of my body that I’ve become a little more fixated on changing. And while I definitely am wearing smaller clothes now and my old clothes are too big for me… I still have this mentality that I’m ‘fat’.
It is the weirdest thing. I never was really fat before. Overweight yes, but not to any extreme where I would be considered ‘fat’ – and that word has a very fluid definition anyway… but again, I’m digressing (hmm possibly another blog post dissecting the word ‘fat’).
In any case, this journey has been more than just changing my eating habits and becoming more active. There’s been a lot of mental and emotional change. My dressing style has changed a little. Before I’d wear things that were loose fitting and more muted in colour (with the occasional shot of something bright) … but now I’m wearing a brighter colour scheme all round with more fitted pieces.
One other thing that I’m not sure how I feel about is the loss of the bosom. Let’s talk about the tatas for a little bit. They deserve the mention, because The Boobage is shrinking.
Now when I was going through adolescence and the boobies came, they weren’t much to speak of. I mean, they were there, but they weren’t … prominent. Some women are blessed with prominent boobies. I was not. However, while in my mid-twenties and as I gained weight, they started to make their presence known and that was probably the only thing I enjoyed about getting a little bigger. But now they’re going away, and I’m kinda sad about that because they don’t look like they did when I was 15. So join me in pouring one out for the tatas. I don’t think they’ll be returning in the same way again.
*googling breast lifting exercises for my work outs*
Until next time,